Dear siblings in Christ,
In a few weeks’ time on Sunday 29th June 2025, I will be ordained at Shrewsbury Abbey. I thought that in this month’s letter to you all, I would share with you a few of the key moments in my road to ordination up to this point, to witness to the faithfulness of God and to encourage you all in your journeys in faith with God. I am often asked the question, why I gave up physiotherapy to candidate for the Methodist ministry in 2019. The answer on the surface is simple, because I sensed God’s calling to serve as a presbyter in the Methodist Church of Britain, however the tapestry of life reveals a more complex and longer journey. The picture below reflects how God called, guided and affirmed my path into ministry and beyond. A picture drawn for me in theological college to reflect that stepping out in faith in the right direction, has been guided for me by a sense of God’s peace, amidst God’s river of life. 
A peace that is not related to what is going on around me, but a spiritual peace, that is difficult to put into words. A peace that combines the stillness reflected in Psalm 46 verse 10, “Be still and know that I am God’ and Philippians chapter 4 verse 7, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding”.
My journey began aged 20, on a trip with World Horizons to Tanzania, to encourage churches in the rural villages around Arusha. I had been a Christian for seven years, was in training to become a physiotherapist, and engaged to be married. In Tanzania I was part of the prayer ministry team. At an evening service the final hymn was, Singing the Faith No 20, “Be still for the presence of the Lord”; words can’t describe the feeling of peace, the presence of God through the Holy Spirit that I felt, during which I sensed a guiding into becoming a Methodist minister. Now I would like to say at this point that I responded to this sense of call, but to be honest, I told no one. As a minister’s daughter I understood the challenges of being a minister, I was young and fearful. Instead, I denied the calling, well maybe buried it. A friend recently challenged me as to whether denying is the right word, and I think she is right, I knew the calling was real, but I lack the courage to explore it with fellow Christians.
In the years that followed, I married Robin, and we had three lads: Joseph, Anthony and Benjamin. Alongside motherhood my physiotherapy career progressed. We moved from Chippenham in Wiltshire, to Bracknell in Berkshire, Thirsk in North Yorkshire and then to Worcester. Over these years as a family, we worshipped in different churches, mainly due to finding a church that the children settled in. Worshipping in a Baptist church for five years, an Anglican church for seven years and then we returned to the Methodist Church, when we moved to Worcester. During this time, I kept God at arm’s length; reflecting on the picture I would be sat on the rocks with my feet in the water or on the bridge above. However, whenever I was too far away God would bring me back into the life-giving waters through conversations and worship.
Time passed, anybody close to me would have seen that I was always striving for the next thing, which was either a specific job, achieving a qualification or a personal fitness goal. An outward striving due to an inward turmoil, because every road that I thought would bring me peace, never quenched my thirst for God’s guiding peace.
Three turning points brought me to a place where I was open to trust in God and begin to explore my calling. The first one was in 2009 at my grandma’s funeral, during the singing of a hymn “Thine be the Glory”, I had a picture of myself being the minister leading the service, which vividly brought to life my experiences as a 20-year-old. The second one came in 2015, when we moved to Worcester, I was resisting my husband’s wish to worship at the local Methodist Church and I foolishly put God to the test. On the second visit to the church, I said if someone remembers my name I will stay Lord. The service finished, I was about to leave, and I heard Margaret saying Samantha, and you could say the rest is history! Why was I resisting becoming part of the Methodist Church, it was because I felt so at home in the church and knew that if I stayed that it was time to explore my sense of calling with others. By this time, I was no longer on the edge of God’s flowing water but in the water, spending time with God daily, through prayer and studying the Bible.
The third turning point came once I started to step out in faith and share my sense of calling and test it out. Firsly sharing with the minister and my husband, and then at the Local preachers meeting, as I offered myself to begin to train as a Local Preacher. As part of my training, I went to Cliff College in 2017, and it was during this time that I was drawn to their prayer labyrinth and the wooden cross (picture below). As I walked around the labyrinth, I could see how all the twists and turns of my life always brought me back to Jesus and the sense of peace. A peace that is not dependant on life’s circumstances but instead when I am following God’s path. For me it was time to lay aside physiotherapy and to begin the journey to become a Methodist minister.
Three pivotal points that changed my life as I trusted God’s calling and candidated for presbyteral ministry in 2019. There have been many surprises and blessings along the journey, as well as heartaches. Heartache hit when a year into my training at The Queen’s Foundation Ecumenical Theological College, when my husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. A devastating diagnosis, which turn our lives upside down. However, the Methodist Church pastorally held us as a family by slowing down my training so I could care for my husband and continue my training. Losing Robin within three months of entering circuit ministry as a probationer here in Northampton has been hard, as I am sure you can imagine. The river around me was intense, but at last I felt like I was exactly where I was meant to be. I have been richly blessed by the care and support from within all the churches in the circuit.
God’s guiding peace has affirmed to me on countless times, that even though I do not have the strength to face the day, that the river around me feels too strong, there is peace. This might be when I’m leading worship, presiding at Holy Communion, pastorally visiting or leading a funeral. God has met me in the silence and in the busyness of circuit ministry. There is healing within from the heartache as I journey with God. My prayer is that as you read of my journey with God you too maybe encouraged to step out in faith with God. I would like to thank you all for walking with me over the last two years. Being part of the wonderful Christian community here in Northampton is a privilege and I look forward to all that God has in store in the years ahead.
Yours faithfully,
Revd Dr Samantha Gillard
Minister, Northampton Methodist Church & Circuit.
